Hatred
by promise.me.forever
Summary: Damon Salvatore hated a lot of things. And as much as it pained him to acknowledge it, Elena Gilbert was not one of them.


**Author's note: Hello, everyone! This is my first time posting in this fandom, and can I just say I'm officially obsessed? I read the books and I'm a huge fan of the TV show and my God, is Damon ever my favorite character. I can now say I've officially jumped on the Damon/Elena bandwagon - after that epic dance scene, how could you not?! Anyway, I'm very excited for the rest of the season and cannot wait to see what else it has to offer. This just a short one shot about Damon reflecting on his various thoughts. I'd say it takes place after the last episode, 1x20, Blood Brothers. **

**Hope you enjoy it, and review at the end if you'd like! I would love to hear from you guys. =)**

Damon Salvatore hated a lot of things.

First of all, he hated Stefan. Yeah, yeah; they were brothers. Super-dee-duper. It didn't stop him from hating and truly disliking the guy. Not only was he, too, once competing for Katherine's love – he was the one who had shoved a human in his presence, begging him to feed in order to transition into a vampire. And sure, okay, Damon had done it to be with Katherine _and_ escape from his destiny of dying, but let's face it: if Stefan hadn't come barging in with his "gift" of a human girl to feed on, Damon would've died in that field. He would have died because his father shot him, ashamed and all alone, his soul searching for his one true love. But no, Stefan had to go and ruin it. And now, 162 years later, Damon is not alive, but still living – still searching for his one true love, except with every pulse and second that ticks by, pain lives too, unyielding, continuing just as his existence does.

Oh, and yeah. He killed their father. Not that it matters, as his father for all intents and purposes, had killed _them –_ he was still their father. When it comes down to cold, hard facts, that's what it read. Stefan had killed their father and fed on his blood to transition himself to a vampire.

Second, he hated Katherine. What a royal, backstabbing _bitch. _Who basically gives you the tools to transform into a vampire for the purpose of being together forever, and then completely bails and leaves you to die? And, let's not forget, then proceed to run away, not caring at all where you end up _or_ that you've been endlessly chasing them for over 100 years? Damon had believed with all his heart that what they had was real, but apparently he was dead wrong. He didn't want to accept this fact, but what else could he do? Where would he go? He couldn't search the Earth for her, not really. He spent more than a century looking, and that's when he thought she was in one place. He shuddered at the thought of eternally searching, forevermore, with nothing to show for it.

He also hated how every day, looking at Elena Gilbert reminded him of the pain. How it reminded him of what he could never have, what was out in the somewhere world, just out of his grasp. But something else, something more powerful had recently overcome this pain whenever he looked at Elena; something he was afraid of identifying. He didn't like it, not at first, when the feeling was so sudden and new.

Perhaps most importantly, he hated how Elena Gilbert made him feel. As a rule, Damon loved to control people. He loved to have all the power, right at his fingertips, scheming everyone's every move and response. His compelling power was so often used it probably could have (okay, it _is_) been seen as abuse, but no matter. It didn't matter to Damon. What people don't know doesn't hurt them. That's how the saying goes, right?

But with Elena, it was different. He hardly ever used his compelling power on her – if at all – he liked for her to have her freedom. It was the only reminder she _wasn't_ Katherine; she was her own person, despite how much she looked like her. And for some reason unbeknownst to him, he felt as if he needed to _protect_ the girl. He didn't like it when she placed herself into dangerous situations – it made him anxious, uneasy – or when she was troubled. But then again, once you're rolling with vampires and witches, you're almost asking for trouble. Not that he was too pleased with that, either.

Elena Gilbert was growing on Damon Salvatore, and he didn't like it one bit. Not at all.

He hated how she was _better_ than Katherine. Not just looks-wise – but as a person, too. Katherine was cruel, manipulative and unforgiving; there was no denying that. She was careless and somewhat stupid, blinded by what she wanted and let it get in the way of what was rational. She didn't care Damon (and let's face it, Stefan too) had become a vampire, and didn't even bother telling him she didn't want him anymore. Not even a note or a postcard; no, instead she let him roam the Earth for over a century, lusting and yearning after her as if he had no other life ambition.

Elena. Elena was caring, genuine, and above all, she was _true._ She didn't play games, she didn't manipulate others, she thought of everyone above herself. She protected the ones she loved, she put herself in danger to save others – she was a classic heroine. And sure, Elena was the "spitting image" of Katherine, but not to him, now, not really. They were different. _Elena_ was different. The way she carried herself, the way she approached others – it was so different that at first it was _weird_. Elena surprised Damon, surprised him so much, he was put off by her presence sometimes. She didn't scowl or have stealthy glances, no. Elena _glowed._ She shined, genuinely shined, and didn't allow anyone to steal it.

The more Damon thought about it, the more he thought that Elena just might be what he needed.

Not that she would ever have him.

Not with Saint Stefan in the picture, the knight in shining armor, the prince to her princess.

She wouldn't even consider it. Not the trouble-maker, sarcastic son of a bitch who torments her and her one true soul mate.

No, he had to stay behind the scenes. Behind closed doors, where no one could notice – that's where he was best. He would stay there, until the time was right.

Yes, he would remain there, long, until her faith in Stefan quivered. And when it did, Damon would be there in a heartbeat, fighting for her like no other. Because after all, he needed something to show for his existence. He needed something to _live for,_ not yearn for.

He could see, too, how she was unsure of Stefan – how she was pleased with their dance at Miss Mystic Falls, how she had reached out for protection when Stefan had gone off the deep end in the woods… he knew it was there. That part of her could love him, too, if she let it.

And he would be damned to hell if he let that part slip away. He wouldn't let it. Not this time.

No, this time, Damon would win. Not just for revenge, but for him, too. Damon needed Elena, whether he liked to admit it or not.

He knew Elena needed him just as much. He would just have to show her she did.

Damon Salvatore hated a lot of things.

And as much as it pained him to acknowledge it, Elena Gilbert was not one of them.


End file.
